If you follow my Twitter and stay up until the wee hours of the morning for some reason, you might have seen what happens when a stinkbug gets into my apartment and lands on my S.O.
(Spoilers: Nothing good.)
We didn’t know it was a stinkbug at first — It landed on him, panicked, promptly fled, and then panicked a bunch more while the large, oafy cat tried to eat it. (The small, sensible cat sat on the bed beside me, where she did not receive a facefull of insect butt chemicals.)
In my years of existence in this vale of tears, I had never had occasion to smell a stinkbug. I didn’t even see the thing until after it was dead and Pye was inhaling it like the filth wizard he is. After my S.O. came back to bed, however, the smell was unmistakable. Even if you’ve never gotten up close and personal with eau de Pentatomidae before, there’s only one conclusion to draw between “mysterious insect” and “sudden and inexplicably powerful stench.”
The rest went kind of like this.
Are stinkbugs like skunks? I don’t know. I tried looking up “how to get rid of stinkbug smell,” and got everything from “use some tomato juice” to “Buy this product from my essential oil company! It’s totally not a pyramid scheme!” As both tomato juice and patience for MLMs are in short supply in my household, I was relieved when I found this handy video on how to maybe hopefully smell less like a chemical toilet fire.
With no time to measure (and I definitely wasn’t going to use up an entire quart of peroxide), I mixed it up and poured it on my S.O. (who bore it good-naturedly, though he seemed to have mixed feelings about the entire procedure). I even managed to get most of the baking soda and soap in the bowl with one hand while keeping Pye away from the half a stinkbug in the garbage, which I consider a personal triumph.
“Now what?” my S.O. asked, dripping foam and smelling strongly of stinkbug and Dishmate.
“Wait five minutes, then take a shower,” I said.
Fortunately, it worked. I am hoping it will be similarly successful after I dump it on all of the places Pye saw fit to torment the bug before its demise. Easily half of my couch smells like some kind of insectoid auto-da-fé right now.
I thought it was getting too cold for them to be out and about anymore. We’ve had a few near-freezing lows already, and we haven’t been getting any visits from any other bugs. Truth be told, I’ve been kind of complacent about that lately — with my nepenthes, I don’t really have to worry much about bugs to begin with. Between it and the cold weather, I figured we were in the clear!
How’s your week going so far?